dear Facebook

Dear Facebook,

I am writing to you because you are a dear friend and I am finding speaking to you very difficult these days, you have stopped listening to your friends and close ones and I am hoping you will have time to read my letter.
We have been friends for a few years now and I value our friendship, this is why I am concerned for you and I am very worried about your general well-being.

I don’t recognise you any more, almost every time I see you you have a new look what happened to your lovely old one? you got tired of it and went to the hairdresser for a re-looking fine with me but please make up your mind I am starting to worry you are suffering from a severe case of multiple personality.
What is wrong dear friend, every time I try to write or click on your face you seem to slow down then cough a bit then completely freeze on me…..what’s wrong, I am really worried…are you on drugs? are they the cause of what is happening to you?
You know who I am dear friend and you know my likes and dislikes, so why do you keep pushing strangers on to me asking me to be their friend? you know very well how I don’t like receiving messages from strangers so why do you keep handing my contact details? you know I am not interested in buying any new products I have no more space for more stuff I don’t need… why do you keep asking me to click on your new advertiser palls? Is it a secret message from you… you secretly want me to get angry and not speak to you again so you are rid of me? if this is the case just tell me and I will respect your choice and let you be with your new friends.
I gave you a spare key to my wall for emergencies, but recently you have been abusing our friendship inviting yourself to my home and re-arranging my furniture and belongings without asking me. If it makes you laugh to see me confused when I come home, can I please ask that you only play that joke on me once a year?

I think I spoke enough dear friend, if you like me as much as I used to like you and if you still want me around for a while longer please be quick in getting out of your apparent confused state.

Yours sincerely

12 responses to “dear Facebook

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