when running late – how to make stylish excuses

“Beautiful people are sometimes more prone to keep you waiting than plain people are because there’s a big time differential between the beautiful and the plain” Andy Warhol

Even with the best will in the world sometimes you just won’t make it (so true, I am a professional later). It is a myth that timekeeping in unstylish. But while being fashionably late is one thing, being supremely delayed is tardy, chaotic, ill mannered and downright rude.

Only fashion shows and marriage proposals can be truly delayed, and even they must have a cut-off point. For fashion shows it’s three or four hours max for a new designer, and that’s only if it’s a really, really, really hot ticket. Marriage proposals, if it’s 9 months and there’s no action it’s time to leave.

To each delay an apropriate apology, here is a guide to help you out:

0-20 minutes: No excuses necessary. You have arrived, what is the problem?

20-45 minutes: Disarm irritated faces with compliments and follow with a casual apology, blaming external factors (off course it was never your fault). Your opening speech could run along the following lines “Oh how lovely to see you all again. you look so well. Nightmare getting a cab/traffic/parking…isn’t it?” (delete as appropriate)

45 minutes-1 hour: Vaguely suggest a day of exciting trauma, but be careful not to elaborate, settle in quickly and become absorbed in the current conversation. “What a day! you just couldn’t imagine. Oh well at least I’m here, so what have I missed? anyone else have trouble getting a chauffeur to drive them here ce soir?”…..etc

1hour plus: This requires the showstopper entrance, but it is no bad thing as it will remind everyone that you are a special creature and can’t be expected to keep standard timekeeping. As Marilyn Monroe once said “I have often been on calendars but I have never been on time.”

For inspiring entrances, or ways to get ready, do your homework. Watch Grease for Sandy’s jaw-dropping transformation.

From: How to Walk in High Heels

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9 responses to “when running late – how to make stylish excuses

  • Marvin

    I am not a Seinfeld fan, but I always liked the way Kramer made his entrance, bursting sideways through the door and skidding to a stop.

    • kittyKat

      I am so glad you are not a Steinfeld fan Marvin,that alone tells me that you don’t buy the idea of how much fun it is to get the “NATURAL HIGH” from a fresh new romance for women,a new conquest for a men.It sows seeds into the minds of married men to want to play the fields of fire and jump into the sack with any Paula,Dee and Harriet that comes along.

  • kittyKat

    9 months for marriage proposal,thanks,that’s good to know,the information will come in handy.I’ll pass it along and will put it to good use myself,I’ll start counting the minute some dude finds me that I like too,I do not indent to waste my time on any man,no I’m determined,not any single one.

    • melicieuse

      9 months kitty 9 months and then it’s the door…..well not necessarily 9 months from the time you meet but 9 months from the time you realise he likes you (which should be pretty close to when you meet)

      • kittyKat

        Or as in my case it’s taken me 4 years,7 months,2 weeks and 1 day to drag it out of him yesterday kicking and screaming that he likes me, that he likes me after I started threating him.I think I will continue the threats to get some more compliments, I’m thrilled with the result, as I start my calculation.We shall soon see how gaga he is over me.

        • melicieuse

          hahahahahahahaha im glad my post inspired you into the threatening (when bribery doesn’t work, threatening is the answer)
          ahaa so wedding bells or a nice fat drink sometime in December

          • kittyKat

            Oh!Nice around the holidays, that will make it 5 years,4 months,2 weeks and 1 day,or 9 months like you see.Now if I get a nice fat drink,what might that entail?I’d like to prepare my mind for it ahead of time.I know one thing, if wedding bells await me in December nobody will be able to gossip about a RUSHED wedding,but of course they will also know that I am 55 so if anyone started a rumor that we had to RUSH the wedding,that rumor would soon be shut down.And another thing, I would like to enjoy my time together with my husband just the two of us and not RUSH to get pregnant the first month of my marriage.Who does that?

  • almondjoycie

    too cute. I will have to remember those for occasions to come. but, sorry the leather pants and hanging cigarette, will never work for me. i better never be that late!

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