Category Archives: scandal

a lesson in customer care by Emirates airlines

if all airlines in the world followed Emirates airlines’ customer care policy i wouldn’t be surprised if people stopped flying and went back to camel back caravans

here is Emirates airlines response to an extremely bad travel experience i have had with them last month, basically everything that could go wrong with the flight went wrong and instead of trying to ease the pain they are just adding insult to injury

the response can be summarized to: well, unfortunately we only care about business and first class ticket holders, but that you for flying with us. but hey judge for yourself

23 April 2012


Mr xxxxxxxx

Email: xxxxxxxx


Dear Mr xxxxxx,


Thank you for visiting Customer Affairs on 3 April.


Please accept our sincere apologies for the inconvenience you and xxxxxxxx experienced due to the delayed departure of flight EK651, from Colombo to Dubai, on 2 April. Our Daily Operations Report shows that this flight was delayed for 6 hours and 16 (which meant we were stranded at the airport for more than 8 hours) minutes, due to the late arrival of the incoming aircraft from Dubai, which was attributed to technical difficulties with the operating aircraft.


I do agree that our passengers are inconvenienced when flights are delayed. Whilst we make every effort to transport passengers according to planned schedules, sometimes operational necessities/technical difficulties cause changes to these schedules. When this happens, we do our utmost to minimise passenger inconvenience.


Flights are only operated when our Engineers tell us that it is safe to do so.  Emirates will never compromise on the safety of our passengers and crew.


I do regret to learn of your disappointment when you were not advised of this delay.


Normally, in line with our operating policy, lounge access is not provided to our Blue Skywards members travelling in Economy class. However, as a gesture of goodwill, our Airport Services Manager provided you an access to Sri Lankan Airlines lounge (big fat lie, we were taken to the staff lunch area and were left there for the full 8 hours. we were denied access to the 4 very nice Sri Lankan airlines lounges as we didn’t hold a Sri Lankan airlines ticket. this said place we were dumped at served expired food which gave us severe allergies for 10 days after)  for the waiting period in Colombo. I regret if you were unhappy with this arrangement.


I am concerned to note your concerns regarding access to Emirates Business class lounge at Colomboairport. I wish to inform you that the lounge is exclusively for passengers travelling in Business class (a total of 2 people were travelling in Business class that same day, I am sure they wouldn’t have minded if we shared the 1 bench in that lounge)


I note that you were unhappy that you were not upgraded to Business class on a complimentary basis. I would like to advise you that upgrades are given only in times of operational necessity.  Furthermore, upgrades are given with great reluctance, as we do not upgrade as a matter of course, out of consideration for passengers who pay the First or Business class fare. (out of the whole flight only 10 passengers were Skywards members they were all treated as cheap cattle. (We explained that the 8 hour airport wait was proceeded with a 3 hour drive and that we had to attend to jobs early the next day, and that a complimentary upgrade -to an empty Business class- would give us some much needed rest on the4 hour flight back to Dubai. not saying that after all the suffering it would make us feel that Emirates cares)


I am advised that our Contact Centre staff in Dubai, was unable to upgrade you and xxxxxx to Business class, as there were not enough miles in xxxxxx Skywards account.


It is of further concern to learn that you discovered your surfboard in a damaged condition on your arrival atColombo airport, when you travelled on flight EK348 to Colombo on 23 March 2012 (they forgot to mention the full damage report, it was mildly damaged on the way to Colombo and then irrecoverable damage was made to it on the flight to Dubai)


I wish to advise you that surfboards should be robustly packed, following the below precautions, which are clearly stated on our website, (exactly what was done on both flights)


Fins should always be removed, or, if they cannot be removed, should be firmly packed with polystyrene foam. Both nose and tail should have bubble-wrap or neoprene foam attached for protection. The rails (sides of the board) should have cardboard down the sides to absorb shock. The board should be packed in a properly padded surf-bag. (errrr, seriously???!!!!!! how stupid do you think we are)


Our Conditions of Carriage, Article 8.7.6, which forms a part of your ticket contract states that passengers must ensure that checked baggage is sufficiently robust and well secured to withstand the usual and normal rigours of carriage by air without sustaining damage. (and again what the hell do you think we did???!!! plus it was checked by your staff at departure and arrival)


Furthermore, your claim is governed by an International Treaty known as the Montreal Convention 1999, which has been ratified by the countries where you began and ended your journey. 


Under the Montreal Convention, Article 17, paragraph 2, the carrier is not liable if and to the extent that the damage resulted from the inherent defect, quality or vice of the baggage.  Therefore, we are unable to consider your claim for the surfboard.(bla bla bla bla)


Nevertheless, we remain concerned at your overall disappointment and wish to take this opportunity to restore your faith in Emirates. Therefore, as a gesture of goodwill, without prejudice or admission of liability, Emirates is pleased to credit 10,000 complimentary miles each, to your and xxxxxx respective Skywards accounts.(seriously 10,000 miles????!!!!!!!!! what the hell am I supposed to do with that? a flight to another GCC capital costs at least double the airmiles for an economy fair. and that damaged/broken surfboard has to be replaced where is the money for that Emirates?)


Thank you for bringing your concerns to our attention, and for allowing me the opportunity to respond. We appreciate your support as our Blue Skywards members, and look forward to welcoming you and xxxxxxon board our flights again.(not happening anytime soon)


Yours sincerely,



Amjad Khan

Customer Affairs

now seriously………………….i am lost for words, these guys still haven’t figured it out. they didn’t see all the European airlines fall out of the sky the past 3 years until they cleaned their customer care strategy and started paying attention to their customers, all of their customers (economy class or first class, a customer is a customer point). they still didn’t figure out that its is with economy class flyers that they will stay in business

but hey who am i to talk, i’m only an economy seat buyer, plus Emirates don’t seem to need or want customers their business is keeping afloat with only their cargo service bringing in cash since everything else sank (you only have to visit the shiny Emirates terminal to witness the great emptiness of a falling airline)

Etihad, Fly Dubai, Air Arabia…..get ready to take on a new loyal customer

the day Emirates airlines didn’t need customers anymore

did you know that Emirates airlines think of themselves as such a big regional elephant that they actually don’t need customers anymore?

did you know that Emirates airlines would happily tell you “Fuck you, fly with us soon”, if they:

–  left you stranded in a tiny airport for 8:30 hours

–  made you eat expired food that gives you severe allergic reactions for 15 days

– don’t take care of you while stranded in the airport

– refuse to upgrade you to business class as courtesy when above points apply + said business class is empty

– so badly damage your luggage sports equipment that it is beyond reparable


yes all of the above happened to me on a recent flight with Emirates airlines, I took the pain of actually following their retarded complaint process just to get an answer today (3 weeks later) saying:

“thank you for your custom, since you purchased an economy ticket Fuck you. fly with us soon. we love you”

copy of their response to follow. oh and their Facebook page admin keeps on deleting my comments because apparently “they are against policy”


nice nice

i’m open minded but this is pushing it a little

we have all probably received at least one of these coupon emails offering different discounts in the city you live in or any city you are interested in, it usually has restaurants, SPA/salon, discounts on items that never got sold in stores (remember those products with funky names like the Ab buster 3000…………….man i really want to be a funky product name inventor)

anyhow I as everyone else receive a few of these emails everyday and sometimes check them out there is no shame in a little bargain hunt every now and again, plus sometimes they have good items on discount. and today i received an offer of a different kind……………..get ready, have a seat………to give you all the parameters this particular offer is for Dubai UAE (a supposedly Arab and Muslim state)………………are you ready……………..ok here isa copy paste of the email received from the geniuses at GrouponUAE:

Give Yourself Peace of Mind With an STD Basic or Advanced Test And Consultation from AED555 at XXXX clinic

  • Privacy and Confidentiality for every individual is assured.
  • This test covers the major STD’s such as : herpes, chlamydia, hepatitis B and C, syphllis and HIV.

STDs are diseases that are mainly passed from one person to another during an intimate relationship. There are at least 25 different STDs with a range of different symptoms. The most common methods for the spread of STDs: 

– Blood Transfusions (Not common in the UAE). 
– Direct contact with blood 
– Intimate Relationship with an infected person 
– Acupuncture with unclean needles 
– Shared personal items (toothbrush, razor, nail clipper, etc.) 
– Non-sterile use of tools for Manicures & Pedicures
– Non-sterile use of tolls in dental procedures

Basic Testing: The determination of current infections for Chlamydia & Herpes (i.e early stages of the infection only) and the detection of Syphilis using the VDRL method (basic method with slight chances of false positives).

Advanced Testing: The determination of both current & previous infections for Chlamydia & Herpes (i.e early & late stages of the infection) and Syphilis screening using the TPHA method (Advanced sensitive method)

Please note that if the infection existed for a long time, the basic testing may not be useful.

Get yourself checked with this deal and stay safe

WOW now just wow, I never thought they would push the discount concept this far

– yes medical treatments are a business in this part of the world but commmoooonnn don’t run “discounts” these tests are to be taken seriously and not as a teeth whitening treatment……….. will the patients also get half services and half testing for paying half price?

– WTF  “are mainly passed from one person to another during an intimate relationship” WTF WTF and again WTF, if you must advertise for an STD test don’t just copy and past the definition of an STD from Wikipedia. did the editor forget this was an email going to residents of the UAE? and that in the UAE intimate relationships between 2 humans (man/woman/woman/man/man) are illegal outside the boundaries of marriage………and if you are married you shouldn’t really be testing yourself for STDs transmitted by your spouse………clearly this is targeted to all those SsssiiiINNEeeRRRzzzz ooooooo :-0………no really no kidding this time, shouldn’t they fire the guy who wrote this and get someone who can write more discrete copy……………………….in reality they should also fire the guy who scored this discount deal

Here is the link feast your eyes on their amazing copywriting skills

how much more oil can float on the surface of the ocean?

so when exactly is the US planning to stop that oil from gushing as well as cleaning up the mess???!!!! or are they planning to see how long  can they go about doing nothing (well at least nothing useful) before any international body says anything???!!!!!

Hello UN anybody there….. perhaps its time for you to make the member of the UNEP work for their salaries…..once it is all fixed i would be more than happy for the culprits to appear at a court of law, and really i wouldn’t mind of the government (US) appears in court too as being incapable of stopping the oil leak and not seeming to spend much time or resources at trying to fix the problem as soon as possible. See even if the oil spill is currently only hitting a US coast the whole planet shares the same water

any country or government who wanting to use the planet’s resources should do so responsibly, this includes cleaning up after yourself in case something messes up……………even if the mess wasn’t caused by you but by the people you employed, to the eyes of the world you are still responsible for fixing it

hush hush baby don’t cry……here have a ciggy

2 year old Ardi Rizal from Indonesia is said to be the world’s youngest tobacco addict, I am sure this is wrong as there are bound to be other cases around the world), never the less not being the only one takes nothing away from the story’s shock factor. Apparently his father initiated him to the deadly sin when the toddler was only 18 months old……….yikes

young Arab girl learns to play football in France

it’s been a while since I last posted about a scandal story, I thought this one deserved a post.

both French and UK media seem to have had a brainstorming session about what to do with the sports pages of their editions…….and it seems that the Tiger Woods sex scandal from American media gave them a few ideas, a few weeks ago all British sports pages were plastered with images of John Terry because of a sex scandal, as a result he was destitute of his title as captain of England’s football team. French media replicated with their own football sex scandal, 2 member of the French national footy team are implicated in a sex scandal (Franck Ribery and Karim Benzema)…..see they did brainstorm, they decided it was football and not let’s say tennis players (the UK’s national treasure in tennis is not handsome enough to be believable in a sex scandal, and France well they already had tennis sex scandals of lesbian nature a few years ago….they needed novelty)

you would say, what’s new about a football player sex scandal….AHAA….the newness is that the girl was a minor (as in under 18, not as in working in a coal mine). you would say but melicieuse why have Arab girl in the title of this post….AHAA …..the minor is an Arab girl, a girl named Zahia (supposedly a Moroccan….but sources aren’t reliable).

a little about this little girl, she is a successful callgirl/escort/hooker/prostitute (the papers didn’t agree on what her job title is) and I took the liberty of adding the “successful” to it because really if you managed to rock the media at this age I wonder what she will do when older – well apart from having bigger breast implants-, she only recently turned 18, it is said that she was only 16 or close to 17 at the time of the “happening” … she managed to get involved with several player of the national football team…..she has to be good at her job to be able to manage this (I am sure a lot of older girls of her profession have tried and failed). even if her job -whatever it is she thinks she does-  is shameful in the eyes of a lot of  people at least she is good at it….right? I mean who cares what you do as long as you are good at it…..right?

I can’t get this question out of my head…..where are this girl’s parents? at 16/17  a girl should be no where near such a scandal (no matter what nationality or religion she is…..this is simple common sense). if they didn’t agree with what she was doing, i think they might agree with it now since she is probably making some good money from selling the story and her name…….well enough with the talk, if you would like to employ this girl below is a copy of her CV (I hear she is available for private functions too, no prices were given)

Name: Zahia D

Date of Birth : 12/February/ 1992

Special signs: hair colour and length is subject to availability of extensions at the salon, intensity of the blue in the eyes is subject to availability of  preferred contact lenses brand at the optician’s

Address : Paris – France

Educaton: n/a

Employment history: confidential unless you would like to buy a scandal story, in which case please contact my agent

Skills: masters slight anorexia, perfectly balances big breast implants without cracking my back, can walk and chew gum at the same time, is capable of not talking if requested, a master in the science of fabric saving -please refer to images attached to CV to judge for yourself that I always manage to use the strict minimum amount of fabric-, I am ready to travel if need be as you can judge by some of my photos taken in Dubai

Now if you are still not convinced with her talents and would like to see some references from previous employers, I have one of her reference letters (this is a TV appearance dating a while back, don’t worry you won’t miss her, and no don’t worry you don’t need to understand French to watch it)

on a side note, I am waiting for the next sport scandal in Spanish and Italian media (yes I predict they will also have a brainstorming session) I wonder if they will pick football too – although Berlusconi might want to upstage any such story with one of his own scandals….the Germans, I don’t think they’l want to hop on the sport scandal train, it’s not fun enough for them……….the Nordics, well really when there is no snow their sportsmen are asleep and frankly no one understands them when they speak…plus everyone tightens their eyes to tiny keyholes when they smile (like they would for pictures)…this is a side effect of their too brightly white teeth……..who else..the Greeks, they are time for sport….Belgium….eeuuuhhh do they play sports? Eastern Europe… comment

woman to sell – France said NO

the French Advertising Regulation Authority (l’Autorité de régularisation professionnelle de la publicité – or the ARPP) just banned a billboard promoting a concert for singer Damien Saez. The ban was so controversial and strongly adhered to that even media publishers refused to sell the space for these ads (mainly outdoor media space, which is mostly managed by JCDecaux)

The ad was banned because is depicts the image of a naked woman in a supermarket trolley, the authority said that the image (photo by Jean-Baptiste Mindino) infringes the regulatory body’s recommendation with regards to imagery of human beings, they said:

“this image is degrading to women, because the woman is naked and in a supermarket trolley thus portraying her as goods for sale”

The regulations states that advertising cannot and shall not reduce the nature and image of a human being and in particular women, to the function of an object, and when nudity is used it is recommended that it’s representation cannot be interpreted as degrading.

What caused the heat this time was not banning this ad, but that the authority banned the replacement advert that was submitted to replace the naked woman in a trolley

translation of this replacement advert: “The Photo initially planned for this advert has been banned from the billboards of our public transport” (I am not using a direct translation as I think this version proves the point)

because of this double ban, outdoor media publishers decided not to sell the space to Saez choosing to stay out of the argument. Better be on the safe side of the authority. Saez on the other hand is outraged because he now accuses that same authority of censorship towards his artistic creativity……hhhmmmmmm not sure about this one, I think he meant freedom of speech

I see why the authority banned the 1st ad……but why are they still allowing everyone else to use scantily clad curvy bombshells to sell everything from shampoo to cars….is that not degrading? see these were never banned (I’m just adding 2 or the post will be too long to read)

Does the authority have too much to lose if they ban the heaps of ads with women objects in them? the authority does regulate the industry but at the same time it has to play it right or it will kill the industry…..imagine if they did play by the rules, over 75% of  ads will be banned meaning that millions will be lost in execution/planning/strategy work and a few other millions will be needed for the re-work…..this will in turn push advertisers to pump less money into the industry as it has too much at risk….or maybe it will push them to be cautious thus killing creativity then in turn the whole market to collapse from lack of funding and a dead creativity…….which will result in an authority making itself redundant as it will have nothing left to regulate.

I am not trying to find excuses for Saez, I agree women should not be used as object or degraded all for the name of advertising (even if we all know that those are usually the ones that bring bigger sales numbers), but I just don’t think it is fair to play by double standards since Saez being a singer/artist he wouldn’t have another album let’s say before at least another year if not longer so he would not need to produce advertising until then…..thus making him not too important -financially speaking-  to the advertising industry so they whack him on the head with the rules.

And what is it with banning the replacing advert……there was no woman or degradation on it, it didn’t even have a photo (FYI, reason given for banning the replacement was that “it made reference to the banned advert”)………………..could this be personal? does someone in that authority not like Saez’s music? did he not give out enough free tickets?